Triumphant Return

Back when I was pregnant, and in the early days after Rhys was born, there were 2 questions I was asked a lot, that in my mind kind of contradicted each other. The first was, "Are you taking the full year?". In Canada, working women can take one full year off after their child is born, and the Federal Government will pay them to do it. Seems like a no-brainer. I can think of a handful of reasons why someone would choose to take less than the full year, but I assume most people take it all. The way this question was asked always seemed to imply the thought that 'You're obviously going back to work, but WHEN will you be going back'.

Then came the second question, 'Will you be going back to work?", which was always an annoying question because, hello, my baby is 3 days old! I don't want to think about this right now! And also because, unlike the first question, this one seemed loaded with a hidden agenda, like the person was trying to gage how much I loved my baby, or how important 'being a mom' was to me, or something.

Or, maybe I'm just overly sensitive and people were simply trying to make conversation because they were uncomfortable because my boob was hanging out.

From the get go, my plan was to return to work. My first day back to work is tomorrow, and I've barely had time to process that. With birthdays, and daycare, and ear infections and Folk Fest, July is a blur and I haven't thought about it in too much detail. It will be like pulling off a bandaid, and perhaps that is a good thing.

I'm thankful that daycare is going well, and Rhys will be home with Warren on my first day back. I kind of have that feeling you'd get as a kid, at the end of summer holidays when you had all your new school clothes and new stationary stuff and you had butterflies in your tummy because you couldn't wait to see all your friends, but then after 2 days of being back you realised 'Ick! I'm back at school!' and suddenly you wanted it to be summer again. That's what I'm in for, I expect.

To psyche myself up, I dug up an old blog entry from way back in April 2008.

It was called 10 Things I Love About My Office Job . Maybe in a month or so, I can update the list, but for now it was great for a chuckle.

Now, what does one wear on the first day of her Triumphant Return To The Work Place?

Insightful

Yesterday Kirsty and I were talking a lot about parenthood and how awesome it is, and yet how at the same time is full of challenging moments and moments that downright suck. But we love it! And then I read Backpacking Dad's post 'Do Parents Hate Parenting?'.

Worth the read, especially if you're home, bored, nursing sick kids or recovering from ear surgery and need something to read to pass the time...

I wish I could write insightful posts like Backpacking Dad. Rhys' poop is really sticky these days! Oh, wait...that's not insightful at all. *SIGH*.

Ebb and Flow.

Whenever a fellow Blogger goes a long stretch without posting, I can't help but wonder why. Are they super busy? Busy with WHAT? Are they down in the dumps and going through a rough patch? Did their computer break? Maybe their kids stopped being amazingly interesting? Or, worse, maybe they have decided to go out LIVE life, rather that sit around and write about it? Oh, that would be awful.

Now that I have become that Blogger, I can tell you this...

I am not any busier than usual.

I am not down in the dumps.

My computer is working just fine.

My kid is still UBER amazing and interesting.

I still love writing about my life.

So, the mystery continues...

Hell In A Hand Bag

This post was spurred by a conversation at Glee Club. I asked if anyone had heard Rhianna's new song 'Rude Boy', to which I was replied "Hells no! I'm old! Ask me about a Wiggles song instead!". I heard this song on the radio and could not believe what I was hearing. After Glee Club I watched the video, and, it got worse.

If you're going to watch the video, I suggest you distract your kids for a few minutes and make sure they're not in eye or ear shot.

Rhianna Rude Boy Widescreen Version

Based on this video and song, I'm a little concerned for today's youth.

But I'll still crank the volume when it's on the radio, because DAMN it's catchy.

Six Month Snapshot

Rhys is 6 months old today, and I'm so happy because everything about our lives right now is really great. We have a 'routine' (in the loosest sense of the word), yet everyday is different because Rhys is learning and changing and discovering right before our eyes. Our nights are quiet and peaceful and restful. Warren & I still go out for brunch with friends, go to movies, read books, plan vacations and LAUGH. Oh, how we laugh... Rhys hasn't changed our lives, he has merely improved them beyond recognition. He simply makes everything better. If our lives were a DQ ice cream cake, Rhys would be the chocolate crunchy bits. He gives me a reason to get up in the morning, literally. I love lifting him out of his crib first thing, when he's still in his sleepy fog and a bit frantic for his breakfast, and taking him to the living room and nursing him on the couch with the morning news in the background. After our post-milk snuggle he'll play on his mat or in his chair while I have a coffee. Mornings are so nice with him these days.

Rhys, you are my heart.

Some notes I want to remember from the 6 month mark:

Rhys, you....

• Sleep on your side a lot now.
• Roll around a lot.
• Can pick up a soother and put it in your mouth on your own (most of the time).
• Have lost the 'training wheels' on your excersauser, so you can now sway from side to side and front to back to practice your balance while playing.
• Are very adaptable.
• Have been eating rice & oat cereal for a month now.
• Can drink small amounts of water from a cup (with an adult holding the cup of course). So far, you really like water.
• In the last week you have tried yams (not your fave at this point), carrots (diluted with wheat cereal you like them) and peas (also diluted).
• This now means your spit-up stains everything, and your BMs are a rainbow surprise.
• Have outgrown all your 3-6 month sleepers.
• Like to screech.
• Are really interested in the dogs, River & Porter, and often smile and shake with anticipation right before they lick your face.
• Enjoy bath time more & more and are fascinated by 'drips' coming down from a wet cloth.
• Become easily distracted while eating and during story time.
• Have just begun to sit on your own, unassisted, for maybe 10 seconds before toppling over.
• Still nurse first thing in the morning, and drink breastmilk from bottles the rest of the day, sometimes needing to be supplemented with formula. You don't seem to have a preference, you just like to eat.
• Sleep from 7pm to 7am most nights. Last night you slept from 6:45pm to 8:15am! It's a rare day that I am ready to get up before you are.
• Are a total clown.

Another note from last night...you slept on your tummy for the first time! Considering you slept so late, I think those parents who put their babies to sleep on their tummies are on to something! Here is a photo of the video monitor of you sleeping at the top of your crib, on your tummy (you started the night on your back, centered in the crib):

To top of this snapshot at the six month mark, my favorite. The Comparison Photos.

A couple days old:

Six Months Old:

So, Bubsy Brown. What's next? Whatever you have in store for us, Warren & I can't wait!

Twenty Ten

It's hard to believe that 1o years ago we were bringing in the year 2000. I always feared the day that I would begin to measure my life is decades, but now that it's here, it's not so bad. I remember hearing my parents say things like "Oh gosh, I haven't seen them in twenty-some-odd-years" and I'd be astonished that is was possible to have a life that could be broken into 20 year increments.

We rang in this historical(?) new year with a KFC Feast and Trivial Pursuit with our friends Rob, Tiff, Lana & John. Warren & I were shocked that we made it to midnight, never mind our actual bedtime of 1:30am. The night went by surprisingly fast, which I think is a good sign that good times were being had. It felt really great, actually, to be up late, partaking in some beverages of the alcoholic variety, with other adults, laughing, and our sweet baby sleeping soundly upstairs, visible on the Closed Circuit TV (aka our video baby monitor). I felt grown up and normal again.

As tired as I was in the morning, my fatigue was made more bearable because I have this little clown to wake up with:

(PS - I'm pretty sure this video clip caught Rhys' first word...can you figure out what it was?)

Happy New Year Everyone!

This post is part of my first New Year's Resolution: To blog every day in January. See you tomorrow!

Random Thoughts

1) You know how 'Survivor' always has the final votes on the island, then everyone returns to the studio in Hollywood for the final reveal of the winner? Of course, once in Hollywood, all the women are 'done up' in full hair & make-up. In my opinion, every single one of them ALWAYS looked younger and prettier au naturel. Makes me wonder if maybe we all would?

2) The Balloon Boy Family. Everyone hates them. So why are we worried they might get a reality show? Who would sponsor that? Who would watch that? Who cares?

That's all I got right now. Just trying to get back 'in the swing' of blogging, since it's been a while.

Top 10 Things Not To Write In Your Facebook Status

I read a news article that listed the top 10 things not to type in your Facebook status.

Some of them were funny, but thought we could do better.

So, here's my first shot.

1. is...pinching a loaf / squirting out a Wet Bisette.

2. is...home alone with the doors unlocked and my address is 123 Rob Me Blind Street.

3. is...playing Dungeons & Dragons tonight, anyone in?

4. is. (LAME - been done to death)

5. is...picking a scab and dropped 'the crust'.

6. is...at work / at home. (BORING!!!)

And, the always entertaining first person/third person identity crisis status...

7. John Doe likes my new iPhone, OR even better... John Doe is likes my new iPhone.

8. Jane Doe I HATE THE WEATHER.

Or the blatant ignoring of their name in the status...

9. Jane Doe Who likes my new profile pic?

And the super awkward 'relationship TMI' status...

10. Jane Doe is filling her divorce papers today. FREEDOM!

Feel free to post your own, or add some in the comments!

10 Things I Love About My Office Job

A co-worker did something the other day that made me chuckle, and that has prompted me to think of a list of things I love about having an office job.

Here is goes...

I love having an office job because:

1) ...sometimes I get to leave the office for sound recordings, audition sessions, location scouts, and Starbucks runs. Having an office job makes all these things more special.

2) ...we get 'healthy snack day' on Tuesdays and Thursdays, when the company gives us free fruit, yogurt and granola bars in the morning for free.

3) ...we get 'baked goods day' on Wednesdays, when the company gives us muffins, banana bread, scones and a variety of 'low fat options' in the morning for free.

4) ...of team lunches.

5) ...I can check out your blogs obsessively throughout the day.

6) ...I have a drawer where I can keep all my high heeled shoes.

7) ...it's hilarious when I realise I just emailed a question to someone who sits right next to me.

8) ...some of my co-workers are actually my friends.

9) ...somehow when you work in an office, it's actually cool if you watch Big Brother, because it gives you something to chat about first thing in the morning.

10) ...and finally, the funny thing that prompted this list. My co-worker/friend...we'll call her K (because her name is Kirsty)...peeped her head around the wall that separates us. She's on the phone, and she starts writing something on a tiny piece of paper.

This is her note:

Ha! Luckily, I had a Hershey Kiss in one of my drawers.

Interesting Philosophy

I was snooping around this neat website called blurb.

It's a site I first linked to from [i]love life, where you can basically make your own book (and even turn your Blog into a book) and they will print it and send it to you, in hard or soft cover. Super cool.

I was surfing through the Biography section of books that were created on this site, and came across one that peaked my interest.

It is called: I, Slacker

It is written by a guy who worked for 18 years at Yahoo!, and decided to take 3 months off to do NOTHING.

Here is the cover of the book:


These words struck a cord with me. You probably understand why after reading my previous post.

The Blurb site lets you preview the first 15 pages of the book without buying it.

And in those first 15 pages he had some interesting things to say.

To avoid plagiarism lawsuits, I'm not going to post any of his writing here. But it's worth taking a look.

It's definitely an interesting philosophy on life.

Life

I'm not exactly sure what I'm setting out to write about in this post, but stay with me...

Over the last week or so I've been thinking about the incredible highs and lows that happen in life. And how these highs & lows can happen on an hourly, daily, weekly or yearly basis. And maybe even for some people, a decade basis. Maybe Britney Spears is one of those people...someone who actually has 'a good decade' or a 'bad decade'.

Warren is in a big LOW right now. It's so hard to watch, because there isn't a whole lot I can do to help him. And I see it in his face. I hate knowing that his job - or his life - is wearing on him.

Life is too long and grueling to put with CRAP. I love him so much and hope he's feeling better soon.

A friend of mine is also being CRUSHED by stresses that are coming from her work, family and home life. It's coming at her from all directions, all at once.

Another friend of mine is going through the two biggest HELLS any single mother could ever imagine.

On the flip side I see new babies, new jobs, new marriages, approaching milestone anniversaries...people who are content and in a HIGH. How can we hang on to that?

We can read up on all the stress management techniques out there, but when the sky is falling on us, how do we avoid getting squashed? We RUN... only to find ourselves exhausted, and unable to cope.

Anyway...

Life is just so hard sometimes. Sometimes, the only things keeping us going are the dreams we have about the HIGHS.

But That's OKAY.

I am THRILLED to announce that my Dad & Pamela scored us some Leonard Cohen tickets, for June 2nd, 2008.

The kicker? We're going to see him in Kitchener, Ontario. Not quite what I had imagined in my dreams. Especially after seeing the amazing places he's playing...Denmark, Sweden, France, Germany...*sigh*. But that's OKAY.

Kitchener, I love you. Because you're hosting Leonard Cohen.

So, $100 each for 2 tickets, plus approximately $400 round trip airfare for both Warren & I. That's $1000.00 to see Leonard Cohen. I'm not phased by this one bit. I always told myself that if he ever played one more concert, anywhere in the world, I would try to go. So this isn't too bad. I mean, he could have been playing one concert in Australia. THAT would have been a pricey concert.

Yesterday I went shopping with my friend Kirsty, and when I told her all this, she kind of looked at me like I was nuts. And she asked me why I would spend that much for a concert.

I told her that is was just something on my Life List, and those things are pretty much priceless. When I'm 80 years old, looking back at my life, would I even for a second, no matter how destitute I was, regret spending $1000 to see Leonard Cohen? NEVER. I probably wouldn't even remember the money amount.

So, tell me one thing on your Life List that you would spend almost ANYTHING to do?

Inspiration

I love Blogs.

When I step away and think about what a Blog IS, I find them odd. People sharing personal, day-to-day experiences with the few random people who read their Blog. But, in theory, these personal glimpses are available to the entire world, since they live on the internet.

I also find them strangely addicting (I think some of you would agree). And I find myself wishing other friends would start blogs, just so that I would have more of them to read.

And, I also find them extremely INSPIRING.

A good example, would be today, when my dear friend Tiffany (of the famous TIFFYTOPIA) posted about her first 5:30am workout. I know how difficult that would have been for her (or anyone for that matter!). But she did it. Some people might think, 'oh, she's only done it once, that's not THAT impressive'. But these things need to start SOMEWHERE, and today was the start for her.

So, I thought I'd step back, and think about the individual ways I'm inspired by the different blogs I read, and what I love about them.

Here it goes:

Tiffitopia: Tiff inspires me to workout, or even THINK about working out. She inspires me to be more introspective. She inspires me to write. She inspires me to find solace in songs and their lyrics. I really LOVE how HONEST she is. I love knowing that she has found TRUE LOVE and will be taken care of in every way.

Kelly Family Adventures: Erin inspires me to find fun and humour in the most mundane moments of life. She inspires me to drink STARBUCKS. She inspires me to find BALANCE. She inspires me to become a MOM someday. And I love seeing the amazing support group of friends & family she has in her life.

Baby Blakeney Blog: Keri inspires me to be a good big sister and aunty, by the way she loves her nephews. She inspires me to laugh at myself, and life in general. And I can't express how much I've enjoyed reading about her & Nick's journey through pregnancy, and soon, parenthood. And, she inspires me to wear more BLACK.

Deter's Family: Kara is someone I've only met a few times, through Erin & Keri, but from reading her blog I have been inspired to wear nicer MAKE-UP. I also find it inspiring that her & Ralph made a trip down to Mexico with their very young son. And, like all the family blogs I read, it's great reading about all the milestones these kids reach.

[i]love life: Kal is someone I have NEVER met. I linked to her blog one day through Keri's site (when Keri announced the birth of Kal's daughter), and I have been addicted ever since. I don't even think I need to describe why this woman is inspiring, because anyone who has read her blog would know. She inspires me to be more COLORFUL (which contradicts the BLACK that Keri inspires...). She inspires me to take better PHOTOS. She inspires me to find a PASSION. And, she inspires me (somedays) to GO.

Thank-you all very much for your Blogs.

In Case You Missed It

Here's a clip of the second half of Kanye West's 2008 Grammy Performance, in case you missed it (and in case you care? I guess...)

His mom died this year, from complications from plastic surgery.

I know it seems kind of cheesy - he's a big spoiled Rapper and all - but this performance for his mom was really touching, I thought. He was really close to his mom, and there's just something about a MAN singing about his LOVE for his MOM.

I especially love the line (at the 2 minute mark if you're short on time) 'Last night I saw you in my dreams, and now, I can't wait to go to sleep. This Life is all a dream. So my real life starts, when I'm asleep.'

I think anyone who's lost a loved one can relate to that.

Today Was Better

Today was better.

I did a couple things WELL, that my boss acknowledged. And they were SMALL things. It's nice to be recognized on the small things, because they usually go unnoticed and unappreciated, but it's really all the small things that bring the BIG things together.

Today I also got to experience real mentorship and leadership. It's so great to know there are GOOD people in HIGH positions, who listen, act, and coach. Who are truly invested in the TEAM and the team's SUCCESS.

Yes, today was much better.

Words To Work By

I had a rough day today - work wise.

I have these words hanging on the wall by my desk. They've been there for a while now, and usually go unnoticed. It's not until I've had an unusually challenging day that I look to them again, for some inspiration, guidance, and hopefully, inner peace.

The Four Agreements

1. Be impeccable with your word - speak with integrity; say only what you mean; avoid using the word to speak against yourself or gossip about others; use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

2. Don't take anything personally - nothing others do is because of you; what others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream; when you are immune to the opinion and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don't make assumptions - find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want; communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama; with this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4. Always do your best - your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick; under any circumstance, simply do your best; and you will avoid self judgment, self abuse and regret.

Darn PVR!

So, I'm watching Miss America Live (live is misleading, because I was actually watching it taped on my PVR - loved it this year btw - except for the terrible host) and it gets to the end.

4 gorgeous ladies remain on stage. Mark Steiness says 'And the winner...your Miss America 2008...IS..." Then the **DELETE RECORDING** pops up on my screen! Are you KIDDING ME??

After all the time invested (okay, not that much time...I fast forwarded through most of the TALENT section), I had to watch the last 2 minutes on You Tube, all pixilated and crappy looking.

Boo!

Life List

Yesterday my dad called and left me a message saying "Amanda, please call me back right away. I have something very special to tell you".

Seriously, with a message like that, the news better be awesome. A few thoughts ran through my head. Was Pamela pregnant? Did he win the lottery? Was the family finally invited to 24 Sussex?

Needless to say, I had very high expectations when I called him back.

He didn't disappoint.

He had just heard on the radio that Leonard Cohen was going to be touring again. That's 1000 times better than winning the lottery.

Seeing Leonard Cohen live in concert was something I had on my 'Life List'. You know - that list we all have that notes all the things we want to experience before we die? And many years ago my dreams of that ever happening were shattered when Leonard Cohen shaved his head bald and became a Buddhist Monk. He disappeared off the face of the Earth, so that he could fast and take vows of silence and such.

A few years ago he made the news when an ex girlfriend stole all his money. The details are fuzzy. But, thank-goodness she did, because now he's broke and needs to tour.

So I pray to GOD that I can get tickets. I will pay whatever it takes. I will fly to Russia if I have to.