Telling

We announced the news to some of our family on Christmas Eve. The reactions were substantially different this time, but not any less special.

My Dad was in Winnipeg for Christmas this year, so I decided to wait and call on Christmas Day to tell him. He was very happy, and said he'd suspected since Halloween, which was just a few days after we found out. He said I was a very, very tired Amy Winehouse, so he knew right away.

I told him the official due date was July 7th, and the conversation went like this:

Dad: Oohhh...maybe the baby will come late and share Grampa's birthday.

Amanda: When is Grampa's birthday?

Dad: July 9th (he says in a rather irritated tone).

Amanda: What? Grampa has the same birthday as you? How is it possible that I never knew this?!

Dad: No, no...I'm the Grampa!

I had a good laugh at myself after that. Poor Dad - thought I didn't even know his birthday. Will I have to start referring to him as Grampa now? That is just confusing.

Good Bye and Good Riddance

Adios 1st Trimester. Can't say I'm going to miss you.

You were a miserable sod, and the only real highlight was the 11 week ultrasound at which time I discovered my uterus hadn't let me down.

However, you were made more manageable thanks to Warren, who really stepped up to the plate. Thanks Hon.

Exhale

Today marked a turning point in this pregnancy. I called for the appointment on Thursday, and was lucky enough to get one for 9am Monday. It's at a new clinic that is desperate for clients. As happy as I was to get the appointment, I was dreading it all weekend, and was nearly in tears on my way out the door in the morning (sorry, Warren, for being so snarly and negative towards you). But I couldn't help it. The trauma of our previous ultrasound hung over me, and I honestly couldn't visualize this one unfolding any differently. The words 'fetal demise' kept running through my head, and I couldn't shake them.

This time I went alone, because Warren would have had to let the cat out of the bag in order to come, and I wasn't ready for that.

The technician was a nice English lady named Gillian. She asked the inevitable question "So, is this your first pregnancy?". So I told her my sad story. "Ah, so that must be why you're having an early ultrasound this time?". Ya, if you think 11 weeks is early, I guess. Isn't it normal to get one early? "Do twins run in your family". Gasp. Wasn't expecting that question. "Well," she said, "let's get to it".

As she pressed down on my belly with that little instrument, I held my breath and clenched my fists. Time seemed to stand still as I bit my lip with anxiety, bracing myself for the devastating news that I was sure was coming.

 "Oh boy!" she exclaimed, "baby's bouncing all over the place!" My eyes sprung open, "Really? Really? For real?" I asked in total disbelief. Gillian turned the monitor toward me and there it was. A moving image, a blur of black and grey. A baby. Complete with arms, legs, head and...a very pointy nose? A grin crept onto my face and I EXHALED. This was it. This was the turning point. The point at which I worry less, let my heart go, and fall in love.

5 On Friday: December 12, 2008

1. Like a lot of people, we were snowed in on Sunday, during the big snow storm here in Calgary. We had plans to drive up to Canmore for the night (for Warren's office Christmas Party), and I had booked Monday off so we wouldn't have to rush back. But the weather had other ideas. Our moms were stuck at our house for a couple hours, after some early morning shopping at Chinook. So my mother in law had a nap in the spare room, my mom relaxed on the couch and watched Scrooged, and Warren & I put up our tree and decorations and ate the Janice Beaton cheese we were going to take to Canmore. Then, we went to Mercato for dinner to replace the trip to the mountains. All in all, it was a pretty good 'snow day'. PS - I spent my Monday off getting all my xmas shopping done! I think I'm going to make that a tradition...booking a day off to hit the shops while they're relatively sane.

2. On the bus home the other night, I saw a local pub sign that read 'Book your frugal Christmas party now! Wings - 9 cents'. Gotta love a business that can turn the recession into a marketing ploy.

3. Erin still hasn't commented on last week's 5 On Friday. She's generally a pretty consistent commenter, and Warren noticed her absence. He is convinced this means she is mad at him for **jokingly!** mocking the conversation she had with her son about the word 'chair'. He'd like to call a truce Erin! He loves you AND Anderson AND your conversations! He is very sensitive! If you accept his truce, please leave a comment on last week's post.

4. I have never made a habit of buying 'holiday chocolates' in the past. I always avoided it because I knew I'd just eat them all within the first few days. But this year I succumb to the tempting displays in Zellers and bought Ferraro Roches, Toffiffees, Turtles, Chocolate covered Maraschino Cherries and two tins of butter cookies. I begged Warren to pace himself, because he's the kind of guy who just grabs handfuls as he walks by, then pops them in his mouth without thinking, in front of the computer or TV or whatever. I begged him to 'savour' the chocolates, and be mindful of how many he ate at a time. 'I want them to last until Christmas!' I pleaded. This morning I woke up to notice the Ferraro Roches had dwindled significantly. 'Um, Warren. The Ferraro Roches are looking a little slim'. Warren replied ' Haha! Wait until you see the Turtles!'. I opened the box of Turtles, of which I'd had TWO, and the box was EMPTY, save for one lone Turtle that he obviously had left as a joke. Men, hmph. Oh - and does he ever gain a pound? Nope. MEN! He promised to buy me another box, but what's the point?

5. If you don't have enough blogs to obsess over these days, I recommend Attack of the Redneck Mommy. She is about to embark (well, she's been embarking for a while now, but things are finally starting to HAPPEN) on a journey that will make for some excellent, heartwarming blog posts. She has 3 kids, but her youngest 'Shale Bug' died suddenly when he was 5. He was born severely disabled. She's written a lot about him, and even wrote a separate blog for a while dedicated to talking about him. Anyways - that's all for you to discover on your own if it interests you - but what's really incredible is that her family's experience of losing a disabled son/brother made them all want to adopt a special needs child. And not any old special needs - they wanted the neediest of the needy. And so her new chapter begins. Go check it out and read back starting at 'The Journey Begins, The Journey Part Two, and The Journey Part Three'. It sounds like the angel they've been wishing for has finally found them. Plus, she's funny and brutally honest - 2 key ingredients to an addictive blog. She posts about other things too...mainly her and her husband's sex life, and her amazing boobs. Did I mention she's funny?

A Letter To Little Gas

Dear Little Gas,

First of all, I'll address the obvious and apologize for the sad state of your current nickname. Trust me when I say I don't like the name at all and I hope it doesn't stick around for long. It came about when I was lying on the couch, rubbing my bloated stomach, moaning unhappily. Warren (your dad) saw me doing this and asked if I could feel a 'bump' yet. I said 'sorta, but it could just be a little gas'. In that moment you became our sweet Little Gas. Sorry about that. The other option was 'Demanding Beast Inside My Uterus', so this is probably the lesser of two evils.

Moving on to the point of this letter.

I've had a rough few weeks since I found out about you, I won't lie. Physically I've been feeling like hell (pardon my language), and emotionally I've been somewhat of a wreck. Crying over everything one minute, and giggling like a fool high on sugar the next. The thought of telling people about you makes me nauseous, so I don't. The thought of losing you deflates me, and there's nothing I can do to make sure it doesn't happen. I'm at the mercy of nature, and so are you. So I figured instead of continuing to go this alone, I'd reach out to you. I'd acknowledge you with a letter, and tell you that I am happy. I'm happy to have been thrown back into this so soon. Happy to have a husband who understands I'm going through a lot. Happy to have friends and family who, even though they are completely suspicious, do not pry too much. I am happy that big sweaters are in style (still need to get me some of those), and that tight pants can be explained away with the holidays. Now you know. I'm happy.

Hope you're doing okay in there. Chat soon.

Your Mom, Amanda.

5 On Friday - Late Again: December 6th, 2008 **#4 Updated**

1. Saw the new movie 'Australia' with some lady friends, and the best part was the gratuitous shot of Hugh Jackman topless by the fire, pouring a large bucket of soapy water over his head and rubbing the bubbles into his rippling muscles by fire light. The only thing that would have made the scene better, would have been if it was Warren doing that ;-) I love you honey - Hugh Jackman's got 'nuttin on you!

2. Speaking of movies, is anyone else as excited about the new Terminator movie as I am? Christian Bale as John Connor in the future during the War with the Machines...hello?? This one is SO going to kick-ass.

3. You'd think living is Calgary all my life would make me used to the fact that it can go from -16 to +6 in less that 24 hours. But no.

4. The other day I was watching Erin's video of Anderson learning to say the word 'chair' over and over again. Warren could hear the video from the other side of the room, and when it was done the conversation went like this:

Warren: I sure hope we can have more intellectual conversations than that with our children.

Amanda: Umm...I don't think that's possible before they can talk.

Warren: What?!!

Amanda: Yah, they don't come out reading War & Peace and Allan Greenspan you know.

Warren: What?!!

So thank-you Erin, for giving my husband a dose of reality ;-)

**After reading this, Warren was worried that Erin would be insulted by his comments, so he wanted me to make it very clear that the conversation was in JEST and he was completely joking. I figured this was pretty obvious, but Warren is very sentitive to these things.**

5. I turn 29 this January, which has me thinking about what I want to do for my 30th. I want to do something fun memorable. When Warren turned 30 (before I knew him) he had a week long 'Warren-palooza'. Since so many of our friends are well into their 30s, I worry my 30th will just fall to wayside, because 30 is old news now. In the comments, tell me what you did for your 30th!

5 On 3-Days-Past Friday: December 1st, 2008

1) Our new furniture finally came, after 9 long weeks of waiting. Or was it 10 weeks? I've lost count. Anyways...we're still waiting for window coverings, BUT, without further ado, here are some pics:






And here's a crazy story about our new coffee table/ottoman. We knew we wanted an ottoman/table hybrid, and we wanted to make sure we shopped around to find the perfect one, and not just buy the first one we found. So we went to Home Outfitters, Kincaid Furniture, Lazy Boy, Home Sense, Sears Home and Pier 1. Found a few 'close' ones, but nothing we were ready to commit to. Our last attempt that day was the good 'ole Consignment Gallery. This is one of our FAVORITE furniture stores. It's all consignment, so the inventory is constantly changing and you can find really unique pieces there. We've already purchased our hutch, pub table, British phone booth DVD rack, and a myriad of other items from there. It's always hit & miss when we go, so we weren't holding out much hope after the unsuccessful shopping day we'd had already.

Luckily, we found one we were ready to buy. Then, on the way to the till, HIDDEN behind a couch, was THE ONE. It was a double ottoman style, and each ottoman flipped independently to be a tray. So you could have one side as a cushy ottoman, and the other side a tray for your coffee. Or both as ottomans, or both as trays! And that's not even the cool part. It was in the EXACT SAME FABRIC as our newly arrived CUSTOM couches. Together in our living room (as you can clearly see from the pics) you would assume they all arrived together. It's creepy. It's moments like those that make me wonder about coincidence and fate and crap like that. Like - why we decided to try that store, and why I bothered looking at that couch - especially when we'd already decided on another one. Just weird.


2) One thing I very much dislike about my job: the RED LIGHT on my phone. The one that means I have a message(s). It glares at me - right after a trip to the washroom, or a nice relaxing lunch. It sits there, glowing, mocking me. Every time I see that damn light I get a pit in my stomach and think "which vendor hasn't been paid now" or "what emergency request has come down the pipes this time?" A while ago our company introduced this odd technology where your voicemail can be forwarded to your email. So, instead of listening to messages on your phone, you get an email with an attachment and when you click the attachment the voice message plays off of your computer speakers. At first I thought this was cool, but then quickly discovered that it makes it very difficult to ignore messages. I much prefer IGNORING that evil red light for a few minutes before succumbing to it's evil vortex of mystery.


3) I have this embarrassing habit of chewing my hair when I'm deep in thought or concentrating on something. Most of the time no one is around to see me, so when it becomes embarrassing is when a Director or VP sneaks up on me at my desk, deep in thought, chewing on my hair. I can only IMAGINE what this looks like to other people. I must look like a bearded lady.


4) Only 3 more weekends until Christmas, and they're filling up quickly. Why does December feel like SHORTEST month of the year? Also - the short days are MURDERING me. I am the most useless SACK in the evenings, because it's so dark by the time I leave work I could swear it was 11pm. And who wants to cook or clean or Christmas shop at 11pm?


5) Finally, a shout out to our Sweet Angus, who left us a year ago today. He was a precious soul we never expected to love the way we did. That's the best kind of love. Through surgeries and exploded tumors and a failing spine he showed us what it means to beat the odds and live a better life. As promised last year, we (well, Warren) drank a shot of the Springbank Scotch in his honor. Cheers - to ANGUS.